Hitting a wall

I hit a wall for the second time in my weightloss efforts (the first time being when I started my weightloss journey). I found myself slowly doing away with healthy eating habits that took months (and will take many more months) to develop. After a cheeseburger, fries, AND soda for lunch on Monday I knew I was becoming a different person. Throughout this journey, I haven't ever restricted myself from eating a cheeseburger, fries, or soda BUT I would never be fine with eating that kind of a meal on a regular basis. I wait until I am truly craving a cheeseburger for a few days and then I get a yummy cheeseburger and savor it, usually only consuming 1/2 to 3/4 of it.
This cheeseburger incident is only one of the few horrific choices I have made lately. I have become lazy about preparing my food. I put my foot down though and went food shopping on Monday. I have made all breakfasts and lunches since then. It's only been two days, but it's two days of calories and money saved by making these meals. Bringing my breakfasts and lunches has also ensured that I get more fruit and veggies into my diet.

Food and Moves for the week;
Monday
B- oatmeal with brown sugar, almonds, and dried cranberries
L- Cheeseburger, fries, coke
D- Whole wheat pasta with shrimp and artichoke hearts in garlic white wine sauce
S- none
E- 20 mins shoulders and abs

Tuesday
B- bagel with 1tbsp butter
L- Smartones egg sandwich
D- pizza (2 slices) and salad with 1 tbsp vinegarette
S- 2 clementines, red wine
E

Wednesday
B- yogurt strawberries and sliced almonds, fiber one bar
L- sandwich thin with hummus, roasted red pepper, spinach, and roast beef
D- lemon chicken, cous cous, and spinach
S- non-fat latte, grapes
E- hitting up the gym tonight!

A Tale of Two Cheesesticks

Two polly-o cheesesticks frighten the hell out of me. How could a seemingly delicious snack scare someone?

Well, let's go back 8 years to my sophomore year in high school... Everyday for lunch I walked to my best friends house for lunch. She only lived a few blocks from our high school, so the walk never took too long. Upperclassman students at my high school had the privilege of going out for lunch to their homes or local food places if their parents signed a permission slip. When we'd get to her house, I would get my lunch out of the refrigerator...

Two polly-o cheesesticks

I can remember eating my lunch very slowly and very methodically, trying to make the food last as long as I could, pulling hairlike strands of cheese off the stick and placing it in my mouth, barely tasting a thing. I would chase the cheesesticks with one bottle of water. That concluded my lunch. I never used to think there was anything wrong with eating that everyday for lunch, but when I think about my breakfast- nothing or a granola bar- and my dinner- a bowl of soup or a salad- and paired with 2 hour practices for competitive cheerleading, I realize now that I was not consuming enough food.

Sure, I was at my lowest weight and smallest size of a 6/7, and loving the attention of my body was garnering, but I'm sure my body was suffering from the lack of calories and nutrition it needed to keep up with school and practice.

I don't think I would go as far as to call it anorexia, but it certainly was not a healthy relationship food. It's amazing how healthy I thought I was just because I had managed to get into a size 6. I know now that health doesn't correlate with a size.

I feel healthier now at a much larger size 12. I, and others, need to be reminded that a good relationship with food takes work, but the benefits of a healthy body will make you feel better than any silly size regarded as "the perfect size".

A Few of My (New) Favorite Things

A Few of My (New) Favorite Things:

Admittedly, I have not been to the grocery store in 4 months! My wonderful fiance has been doing all the grocery shopping as I have been working very long hours and very late days, and we always seem to travel during the summer weekends. I broke this trend on Sunday with a couple's trip to the food store. Fiance and I stocked up on stuff for dinner and snacks. Since I hadn't personally been going to the food store, fiance was picking up the usual snacks for me- rice cakes, cheese sticks, granola bars, fruit, etc. But, there are constantly new snack products popping up, so I decided to pick up a few this week and was pleasantly surprised!

Oikos Greek Yogurt with Honey

I have always been a firm believer in Dannon Lite and Fit creamy vanilla. I detest yogurt with "chunks" as I un-affectionately call those foreign particles of fruit that ruin the smoothness that I love about yogurt. I also tended towards sweetened yogurts out of habit. I saw some people seemed to love this Oikos yogurt for some reason and I saw it in the food store and thought I'd give it a whirl. I picked up the honey on the bottom version. The yogurt is perfectly tart and seriously creamy and heavy-bodied compared to the watery Dannon I was consuming. The honey adds the perfect balance of sweetness (aka, not too much honey), but the honey somehow lacks the usual floral taste that I love from honey.

Special K Crackers

I have purchased many different types of crackers in my time as a WW. I thought why not give another cracker a shot. These crackers remind me of Wheat Thins, but they are less "greasy". Something about Wheat Thins was oily, always leaving oil spots on a napkin or a nice greasy film on your hands. I haven't had Wheat Thins in a long time so it's nice to have a cracker that reminds me of them- salty and wheat filled!

I have also been discovering new "out to lunch" places because I am in a new work location (New York City). I had Chipotle for the first time last month. Don't freak out, I may have never had Chiptole before, but I have been to Q-doba several times, and it is just like Chipotle. At any rate, I have figured out how to build a healthy and tasty burrito at Chipotle so I can eat out with my co-workers and not feel like someone on a diet.

Chipotle vegetarian burrito bowl

See Carlos, it is possible to continue eating at Chipotle! This bad boy only sets me back 5 WW points (290 calories, 5g fat, 53g carbs, 13g fiber, 11g protein)

Falafel

Throughout the weightloss journey, I have gradually added foods that I never thought would pass my lips: all sorts of seafood, veggies, fruits, legumes, and beans. I was a very picky eater growing up, so it has taken a long time, but I continue to expand my food horizon. One of the latest foods I have tried, thanks to an awesome place in the city called Crisp, is falafel! I get a beautiful salad from Crisp with humus, falafel, salsa, mixed greens, pine nuts, and wheat pita on the side- yum! It does set me back a lot of points, but it is so delicious and healthful.

I encourage everyone to expand their food horizons- continue to try new things! It'll add variety to your diet in terms of nutrients and keeping things interesting. Also, continue to frequent the places you love, but take some time and consideration when ordering. I know it's hard not to order your "usual", but you'll never break a bad habit if you don't try.

Weigh In and Summer Smoothies

Weigh in: 182.6lbs
-2.0lbs

This weekend I also made one of my stand-by favorites for the summer and or a breakfast on the go: smoothies! I was reminded off how much I miss them when I saw people blogging about "banana ice cream", aka blended frozen bananas.

I used to go to this awesome coffee shop in Hoboken called Frozen Monkey, and they had a specialty drink named after the place that had banana, Tasti D-light vanilla ice cream, and iced coffee. I recreated the smoothie to save money and calories when in college. I replaced the ice cream with frozen chopped bananas, threw in a scoop of protein powder, and used coffee and skim milk to help thin the smoothie to my liking. It was delicious and it prompted me to make different combinations.

I love these smoothies for some many reasons:
The combinations are endless and easy to customize. They taste like a dessert but are very healthful! They help me get bananas into my diet because I am not a fan of them. It also packs more fruit into your diet. They help use up fruit that would have otherwise gone bad. When the bananas are getting too ripe, and I don't have time to make banana bread, I chop the bananas up and throw them in the freezer, same goes for mangos, berries, and pineapple.

Some of my favorites are:

Frozen Monkey (Approximately 155 calories, 1g fat, 34g carbs, 9g protein, 3g fiber)
1/2 cup cold coffee, 1 frozen chopped banana, 1/2c of skim milk and more to thin the smoothie to your liking

PB Banana (Approximately 290 calories, 9g fat, 43g carbs, 14g protein, 3.5g fiber)
1 Tbsp Peanut Butter, 1 frozen chopped banana, 1 cup skim milk plus more to thin the smoothie to your liking

Banana Split (Approximately 300 calories, 1g fat, 64g carbs, 10g protein, 3g fiber)
1 -2 Tbsp Chocolate Syrup, 1 frozen chopped banana, 1 cup skim milk plus more to thin the smoothie to your liking

Berry Smoothie (Approximately 150 calories, 1g fat, 25g carbs, 12g protein, 2g fiber)
3/4 cup frozen berries (any kind- I like mixed berries), 1/2 cup fat free vanilla yogurt, 1/2 cup skim milk plus more to thin the smoothie to your liking

Tropical smoothie (Approximately 200 calories, 1g fat, 39g carbs, 12g protein, 2g fiber)
1/2 cup frozen mango, 1/2 cup frozen pineapple, 1/2 cup fat free vanilla yogurt, 1/2 cup skim milk plus more to thin the smoothie to your liking

Happy Blending ;-)

Food Wars

I have been fighting the good fight all week against food. There were many battles won, but in the end I must win the war.

Last night, I had a lovely time in Hoboken, NJ with my fiance and two of my dearest friends. We went out for Restaurant week and had a pre fix dinner of three courses. I chose the watermelon and brie salad, shrimp nachos (split with a friend), and braised oxtails with gnocchi and carrots, and topped it off with two drinks ;-). The portions were small so it was easy to control myself. The food was good, but it wasn't amazing, so that also made it easy to control my eating.

Afterward, we went for coffee. I had a skim chai latte and I eyed up a beautiful pink frosted cupcake. I blame this lady for my nagging cupcake craving after posting a picture of a frosting filled cupcake! I had wanted dessert all day, so I opted for a gingersnap cookie instead.

This morning, after little to no sleep and drinking last night, I was craving my sleepy hang-over food: the bagel! The bagel lost, however, to the much more svelte oatmeal.

Score 1 for the gingersnap. Score 1 for the oatmeal. And score 2 for me for making better choices!

A little bit of honesty

I over-ate all weekend. I knew I was doing it, but I did it anyway. I am feeling badly about my weightloss efforts and my family right now. This destructive behavior is a direct form of self-punishment.

Friday, I ran 2.5 miles, so I was glad that I am getting back into my running, but I still wasn't proud of myself because it was only 2.5 miles. My eating was fair- cereal, rice cake with peanut butter, chips and queso dip, grilled chicken, zucchini and garlic linguine, and I finished the day off with a hot fudge sundae.

Saturday, I started my day off with 2 donuts and coffee. Lunch was some chicken and eggplant parmesan. Then, I snuck in another donut as a snack. For dinner I made fried zucchini as an appetizer and had london broil, grilled shrimp and a some fettuccine alfredo, and for dessert I had an apple cobbler flurry (apple cobbler ingredients mixed with soft vanilla ice cream).

Sunday was not nearly as destructive as Saturday but fair nonetheless- bagel with cream cheese and half an english muffin for breakfast, a few chips, a piece of a roast beef and cheese wrap, salad, cocktail shrimp, and cake at a bridal shower, then dinner was ziti and 1 meatball, dessert was some peanut butter munch candy from my Poconos trip as I tried to finish the last of my thank-you's for my engagement party.

I have no idea how many points or calories are in the food I ate, because frankly I am not tracking them right now. I have been only tracking Monday- Thursday for the past few weeks. Sometimes, I'll go back and try to track in vain what I ate over the weekend, but we all know I'm not fooling anyone. I'm not getting results because I'm not trying. It's pretty plain and simple.

Maybe writing all this will help me realize the mistakes I am making, or maybe when I weigh myself later today and see the horrific gain, I'll get a slap in the face that I very much need.

Sometimes You Just Want a Doughnut

So you have one.......

I really REALLY didn't want to go to work today. I wanted to lay in bed all day and wallow in my pissy mood. Instead, I got ready really slowly and made a stop at Dunkin Donuts before getting to work. I called my boss and he requested donuts, so I picked up a dozen and some munchkins. I got myself a flatbread egg sandwich, but those doughnuts were calling my name. So, I had one as I sat down to my computer at work. Then, I typed in my password, which reminds me of my weight loss goals.

The doughnut still tasted just as good, and feelings of sadness and regret didn't wash over me. I just enjoyed my doughtnut, like a regular person (ya know, the kind that can control portion sizes and not have guilt after calorie splurging once in awhile). It's rather nice to feel like a regular doughtnut-eating person.

I think it's important for my mental progress to document these feelings. I think it's important to sometimes just have a doughnut.

Panera Sneak Attack

Whoops! A big F-ing whoops!

I enjoy eating at Panera from time to time, but I am well aware that the food is not always the most calorie friendly. I've become best buds with their online nutrition menu to try to combat this fact. I always know which soup to get (Chicken Noodle, Garden Vegetable) and which to steer clear of (Baked Potato, Broccoli Cheddar). I even know which drinks are a yummy treat and a calorie bargain (The iced green tea- yum!), but I had no idea what I was doing on Tuesday night when I haphazardly ordered the frozen mocha drink.

I foolishly asked if I could have it made with skim milk to which the Panera barista replied, "It comes pre-mixed". I should have known right then and there the mistake I was making. I sucked down the frozen mocha drink as I was exhausted after running, having a small dinner, and going shopping for 3 hours. Well, I was catching up with tracking the food I've consumed in the past two days and I nearly started hyper-ventilating when I saw the nutrition of the drink. In weight watchers terms, it was 15 points. 15 POINTS! That is two meals for me. I haven't made a mistake like this in a long time, at least not on a single food item (or to make matters worse a drink, in this case).

I am disappointed to say the least.

Recipe: Baked Chicken, Pilaf, and Zucchini and Onions

This is a dinner favorite for me and the fiance. I posted a while back about zucchini and onions. Well, here's an idea to serve with that excellent vegetable side dish.

Lemon White Wine Baked Chicken
Makes 2 servings: 4 oz per serving- 4 points
Prep time: 5 mins
Cook time: 20-30 mins

Ingredients:
1/2 cup white wine
1 tbsp Dijon mustard
Juice of one lemon
Salt
Pepper
8 oz boneless skinless chicken breast

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 F. Whisk together all ingredients except for chicken in a baking dish. Place chicken in the mixture, turning breast to coat. Place in oven and bake for 20-30 mins depending on thickness until juices run clear.

I made Far East brand wheat pilaf as a side dish. It's delicious and very high in fiber. It makes a quick, no-fuss weeknight meal that is satisfying.

Enjoy!

Cookie Challenge

I baked over 12 dozen cookies on Friday night in preparation for my annual cookie decorating party. I throw a party for close friends and my cousins where I bake the sugar and gingerbread cookies ahead of time and provide tons of decorations such as icing, sprinkles, candies, and we all have lunch, drink some wine, and decorate the cookies. Then, I pack up the cookies and ship them off with the people. It a really great way to indulge in my passion for baking, without being tempted to eat the goods myself.

I'm very proud of myself, I didn't eat a single cookie on Friday when I baked them! This was especially notable because sitting down and eating a few of the cookies I just slaved over had been the way I used to pat myself on the back: "Great job, Ashley. Now that you have tasted these cookies, you can certify that they are delicious!" Instead of the usual fattening reward, I celebrated my cookie making success by taking the time to appreciate how effortlessly I rolled out the rock hard sugar cookie dough (thanks to my sculpted back a la 30 Day Shred), and how I breezed through the night baking all those cookies and still had energy. I amazed myself!

The party was a big hit, everyone had a great time, and I realized that I am really enjoying this holiday season thanks to all the energy I have!

Food Fetish

Here is the list of foods I have an unhealthy obsession with in no particular order:

Macaroni and cheese
Wise cheese doodles
Manchego cheese
Parmesan cheese
Mozarella cheese
Cream cheese
Skim Milk

Zucchini
Pickles
Bagels
Coffee
Pasta
Steak

Wallace (From Wallace & Grommit) likes cheese too

Since the bulk of that list is Cheese, I'm beginning to think I have an unnatural obsession with CHEESE!

Side dish: Zucchini and Onions

Zucchini and Onions
Makes 4 large servings
1 pt per serving
Prep time: 5 mins
Cook time: 25 mins

Ingredients:
2 medium zucchinis
1/2 onion (I prefer spanish or vidalia)
1 tbsp light butter
1/2 cup light chicken broth
1/2 tsp thyme
salt
pepper

Directions:
Cut zucchini into half moons (about 1/4" slices). Chop onion to similar size as zucchini. Place butter in a large pan over medium heat. Once melted, add onion and saute until the onions begin to caramelize and become translucent. Then add the zucchini and saute to soften them slightly, then add the chicken broth and spices. Simmer and stir occasionally until desired tenderness.

This recipe is meant to make in larger batches because it is so versatile. Serve it as a side dish with dinner, then store in the fridge. It can be added to eggs for a yummy omelet or mixed up with some wheat pilaf (or other grain) and throw in some protein to make a delicious lunch. It just gets better as it sits.

Snack Attack Recipes

Spicy Popcorn
Makes 2 servings
1 serving- 3 cups- 1 pt

1/4 cup un-popped popcorn kernels
PAM butter-flavored
3 tsp Paprika
1/2 tsp Chili powder
1 tsp Cumin
Garlic Salt (or plain salt) to taste
Pop the kernels in an air popper, spray with butter flavored PAM and sprinkle over the popcorn. For more even spice coverage, place popcorn in a ziploc bag, pour in spices, seal and shake to coat.

Boneless Buffalo "Wings"

Makes 2 serving

1 serving- 2 "wings"- 3 pts

4 oz Boneless, skinless, chicken breast tenders

1/8 cup All-purpose flour

1/4 tsp Salt

1/4 tsp Pepper

1/3 cup Barbecue sauce

1/3 cup Frank's red hot sauce

1 tsp Garlic powder

Preheat over to 400F. In a bowl or plastic ziploc bag, combine the flour salt and pepper. In another bowl, combine the sauces and garlic powder. Cover a baking sheet with foil (to make cleanup easier!) and spray with PAM. Toss or shake the chicken tenders to coat. Place the chicken in the sauce and gently turn over to coat until completely covered. Place on a baking sheet covered with foil and sprayed with PAM. Bake for 15-18 mins.

For buffalo "bites" cut the chicken into bit sized pieces before tossing in the flour.

Serve with fat free blue cheese, ranch or sour cream (this adds points though!)

Dinner: Stuffed Peppers

The other night I made some delicious stuffed peppers for dinner that were very satisfying! I've made stuffed peppers for a few years, but I've never considered them "healthy" food so I've been avoiding them as a regular dinner option. The new version I made, however, are quick, easy, and a healthy 7 points each on WW!

Overall a great healthy day of eating on Wednesday:

Breakfast
Quaker Weight Control Cinnamon Oatmeal (3 pts)
1 Green Apple (1 pt)
Coffee w/ Skim Milk (0 pts)

Lunch
12 oz (3/4 of a can) Hormel Turkey Chili, No Beans (6 pts)
1 Babybel Light Cheese (1 pt)
Green Tea (0pts)

Snack
2 oz Part Skim Mozzarella Cheese (2 pts)

Dinner
1 Stuffed Pepper (7 pts)
1 Artichoke stuffed with Provolone Cheese (4 pts)
1 Glass of Red Wine (2 pts)

26 pts Total out of 27 pts that I get for the day

Stuffed Peppers Recipe
Makes 4 small stuffed peppers
7pts per serving (serving size 1 pepper)
Prep time: 10 mins
Cook time: 40 mins

Ingredients:
4 small green peppers
Pam non-stick spray
12 oz. 95% lean ground beef
2 cups brown rice (I use one Uncle Ben's Ready Rice microwave pouch)
1 1/2 cups tomato sauce
1 tsp dried oregano
1 tsp dried basil
Salt and pepper to taste
1/2 medium onion diced
4 cloves garlic diced (Note: I like garlic a lot, if you're not too into it just do 1-2 cloves)
4- 1 oz slices of park skim mozzarella cheese

Directions:
Preheat oven to 425 F. Cut the tops off of the peppers and pull out the ribs and seeds. Cut bottoms of peppers if necessary so they may stand during baking. Spray a baking dish with Pam, place peppers in the baking dish and spray them with Pam (both inside and outside). Place in the oven while you prepare the stuffing. For the stuffing, dice the onion and garlic. Spray a non-stick skillet with Pam and heat on medium. Place onions in the pan and cook to soften for 3-4 minutes. Then add the garlic and continue cooking. Move mixture to sides of pan and add ground beef in the center. Cook and break apart the meat until just brown (the meat will continue to cook in the oven). Add the tomato sauce, rice, and spices to the pan and stir to combine and heat through. Remove the peppers from the oven, they should look softer and wilt-y, with juices coming out. Lower the over to 350 F. Stuff the peppers with the beef mixture. Place 1 slice of cheese on each pepper and return to oven for 10-20 more minutes depending on desired done-ness of pepper.

These store well in the fridge for up to 3-4 days, making them perfect for leftovers as a lunch. I hope you enjoy them!