Back and forth

I haven't been posting too often because I keep going back and forth about my desire to continue... much like I keep going back and forth about my desire to lose more weight.

On one hand, at least 15 people told me I look amazing this weekend and that I look like I lost weight - mind you I am up 7lbs from my lowest weight last year. My fiance loves me no matter what I look like - that was reinforced when he never changed how he treated me whether I weighed 155lbs when I met him or at my *known* peak of 227lbs. But, ultimately I am not satisfied with my body, and I want to feel complete and utter love for my body and comfort in my skin.

I have to do this for myself.

Running makes me hungry

Since my last post about exercising in the mornings, I did the 30 Day Shred two more times before work that same week. Then, my work hours decreased dramatically and I took to running outside after work. So, even though I didn't stick with my goal of exercising before work, I have managed to work running back into my schedule.

One problem, however, is that when I increase my running mileage....I GET HUNGRY, REALLY HUNGRY! I struggle mentally with giving my body the calories it wants to keep running and withholding calories to ensure that I lose weight. I find myself in a circular argument with myself and I find my weight lose at a continued stalemate....

What to do? What to do?

Give up running to a less strenuous form of cardio to ensure that I lose more weight or keep pushing myself to become physically stronger through running and keep fueling my body to do so.

Here are a few of my most recent runs: